Productive. Polite. Drained. Burnout Recovery Therapy UK

Esther Dietrichsen-Farley
Aug 8
3 min read

Updated: Sep 25

Burnout is rarely just about work. Even when you step back or slow down, it can feel as though life has not come back to you. This post looks at why recovery is often more complicated than a good rest and how therapy at The Farley can help you find your way back to yourself.

A tired woman lies on a bed, looking directly at the camera with loose hair falling across her face, capturing the fatigue and flatness explored in burnout recovery therapy UK.

When Stepping Back Does Not Bring You Back

You are still doing the things you need to do: replying, making decisions, holding life together. On the outside you look capable. Inside, it is different. You may feel flat, distant from your own feelings, or unsure how to care about things that once mattered.

It is not a collapse that everyone can see. More often it is a slow fade. A quiet loss of energy and connection that you cannot “snap out of”, even with time off.

Burnout Is More Than Long Hours

We have been taught to picture burnout as a workplace problem: long shifts, impossible deadlines. But many people burn out elsewhere. Parenting, freelancing, caring for others, living through loss, or keeping a life going that no longer fits.

A recent Mental Health UK report found 91% of adults had felt high or extreme stress. While most assumed work was the cause, many described a broader exhaustion: carrying too much for too long without space to recover.

Psychologists Christina Maslach and Michael Leiter describe burnout as a chronic mismatch between a person and their environment. That mismatch does not have to be professional. It can be emotional, relational, or existential.

Why Burnout Persists

Realising you are burned out does not automatically bring you back. That is not weakness. It is what long stress can do.

When pressure is chronic, the systems that help you plan, feel, and regulate can become overwhelmed. Some researchers use models such as polyvagal theory to describe how, after prolonged strain, the nervous system may lean towards either constant alertness or emotional shutdown. These are ways the body protects itself. They are not permanent, but they make change feel harder.

Other factors can deepen the stuckness.

Money and responsibility. Scarcity, as described by psychologists Mullainathan and Shafir, narrows focus to immediate survival and makes long-term planning feel impossible.
Identity and role. If you have spent years being competent and reliable, stepping back can feel like losing who you are.
Difference and adaptation. People with ADHD or high sensitivity may have spent years moulding themselves to fit environments that were never built for them. Burnout can be the cost of that constant adaptation.

These are not personal flaws. They are patterns that once kept you going and now hold you in place.

Therapy for Burnout - What Makes The Farley Different

Therapy can help even when life still appears to be running smoothly from the outside. Many people seek support long before anything “stops working” completely.

At The Farley, therapy for burnout is person-centred.

Sessions move at a pace that suits you, exploring what you have been carrying and how it has shaped you.
We work with your lived experience first, bringing in research or trauma-informed understanding only if it feels helpful.
The process is collaborative and respectful; it aims to give you a steady place to reflect and gradually reconnect, rather than following a fixed programme.

People who choose this approach often describe clearer boundaries, less self-criticism, and a gradual return of energy and feeling. Progress tends to unfold through understanding and self-connection, not through pressure to perform.

Starting a Conversation

You do not have to wait before reaching a certain point before asking for help. If you feel flat, disconnected, or unsure how to recharge, therapy can be a place to pause and start finding yourself again.

I offer sessions in Southampton and online across the UK. You are welcome to book a free 30-minute consultation. It is simply a conversation to see if this feels like the right space for you.

The Farley